Carpe Diem!

The illimitable, silent, never-resting thing called Time, rolling, rushing on, swift, silent, like an all-embracing ocean-tide, on which we and all the universe swim like exhalations, like apparitions which are, and then are not.... ~Thomas Carlyle

It had been a long day. Homeschooling and working full time is not an easy task. Thank goodness my children are responsible (most of the time) teenagers who can do their school work with only a little oversight. I was looking forward to getting home, relaxing in front of the TV and watching a movie. However, as I was locking up the salon and putting my things together to go home, Deanna called me.

“Mom!! I got my first pay check today!!” I can almost hear her bouncing up and down on the other end of the phone. “I know it’s kinda late, but can we go to El Paso tonight?! I need to get a few things and we can’t get them here at Dollar General. Pleeeeease!! I’ll help you drive!” I wasn’t sure that last remark would help her cause.

Realize that El Paso is 120 miles from our house and it is about 5 o’clock in the evening. I have to work again tomorrow, so we have to be home by 1 p.m. the next day.

“Well, let me think it over.” I tell her as I get into my car to come home. I can hear the disappointment in her voice as she says a reluctant, “Okay.”

Several years ago, my sister and I were talking about New Year’s Resolutions. She was sharing with me that instead of making a list of resolutions she chooses a theme for the year and tries to remember it as she lives day to day. One year it was Hope, another year it was something else and so on. So, remembering these conversations, I decided to choose a theme for this year.

My daughter is graduating high school; my oldest son is having a baby; my younger son is contemplating marriage; my other daughters are flying through high school; and I am acutely aware that the “empty nest” is coming up fast. Therefore, my theme this year is: Carpe Diem! (Seize the day!). Every day I want to bear in mind the short and sweet time that I have with my children. I want to seize every moment and enjoy every hour. In a very short time, they will all be off making lives of their own in which I will play only a peripheral role.

It is with this in mind that I contemplate Deanna’s request. I could tell her that I am very tired and want to go to bed early. I could tell her that we can go another day (which may or may not happen this month). I could tell her that she will have to talk to her father and maybe he will be willing to take her. But….Carpe Diem! I believe that this is a “capturable” time and I decide that she and I will go and spend her first-ever pay check just like she has been planning since she began looking for a job.

We had a wonderful time! During the two hours there and the two hours back, we had some good conversations. We didn’t get to go to too many places, but Deanna did treat us to dinner and a movie; and she got the few things that she was wanting. We got home about 1 a.m., but the time was worth every second.

A few weeks later, Mikayla and I went to the store to get some groceries. She looked a little pensive and I asked her what was up. “We just don’t seem to have enough time together, Mom!” she told me. “Can we go out to lunch today? Do you have to be at work at 1 p.m.?” I could tell her that I have to be at work and that we will have to do it another time. I could tell her that we can’t afford it and would have to wait till next week. But…Carpe Diem!! I decide that I can go to work late (and I call my colleague to tell her) and we decide to go to our favorite Mexican restaurant.

We had a good talk over the botanas and fajita burritos with salsa. We didn’t really talk about anything important, but every moment was valuable and the fact that it was just me and her was a special thing. I got to work late, but didn’t miss any appointments and we took a bean burrito to her sister who was doing her school work at home.

As the months go by, I am trying to be aware of those times that I can put off the daily tasks (that will get done one way or another anyway) and spend those beautiful moments with my daughters. Sometimes it is just sitting outside on our porch with glasses of iced tea or water, each of us with our own books to read. Sometimes we all jump into the car and drive to El Paso to do some shopping, spend time with friends or see a movie.

A few mornings ago, I got up at my usual 7 a.m. and went to wake up the girls. I love to go into their rooms and say “Rise and Shine!” in an annoying way and hear them groan. However, that day Deanna and Leilani (who share a bed right now) looked so peaceful that I decided to join them. I climbed into bed between them and snuggled down. They cuddled up with me and we “napped” for a few minutes. It wasn’t long before Mikayla came in and joined the party. We spent the next 30 minutes giggling and tickling each other and doing our best to stay on the small double bed. Time stood still. The chores would get done, school work would be started, laundry would get cleaned and breakfast would be had --- all in time. But this moment together would never come again.

Carpe Diem!! My theme for this year. May I learn to seize each moment that I have with my children. All too soon these precious times will be gone. And…how will they learn to “seize the day” with their children if I don’t do it with them? May I never be too distracted with the mundane things in my day that I forget to put attention where it needs to be --- on the hearts and spirits of my children. May I seize each second to connect with them and cement our relationships so that when they do leave, they will return (in a good way) and cherish their time with me.

Eph 5:15 & 16
Look therefore carefully how ye walk, not as unwise, but as wise; redeeming the time, because the days are evil.

Jas 4:14
…whereas ye know not what shall be on the morrow. What is your life? For ye are a vapor, that appears for a little time, and then vanishes away.