“Courage is not simply one of the virtues, but the form of every virtue at the testing point.” C. S. Lewis
One of the things I love about home schooling is that we have the time to do all kinds of things together. None of us, teacher or student, is stuck in a classroom all day waiting for the other to catch up or get the worksheets done. We can actually go out and help our sons and daughters conquer the world, which involves courage in taking risks and facing failures. We can model this thing called “trusting God” and help them do the same. This, after all, is the ultimate goal of teaching our children at home isn’t it? I can’t think of a better time or a better place to take risks, face failures and trust God than with my children while they still live at home.
Sitting on the top rail of the enclosure, I watched my daughter, Deanna, work with her horse. Standing in the center with the lead in one hand and a special “handy stick” in the other, she gave cues and made the animal do several different things. Here she was, so small compared to the horse, and the horse was doing everything she “told” her to do. It was amazing.
A few minutes into the demonstration, my youngest daughter, Leilani, came up to the rail. Looking up at me, she said, “Mom, can I drive the car around the outside of the arena? Just a few times? Please?” She was still too young to get her permit, but she was determined to know how to drive as soon as possible. “Ok,” I replied, and gave her the keys. “Just go slow and be very careful!” Smiling wide, she took the keys and the next thing I knew, the car was pulling off around the dirt track.
I turned my attention back to Deanna and Rasha. The mare was giving her a little trouble and Deanna was “getting after” her. Again, I was struck by the fact that Rasha was so much bigger than this teen and could easily run her over or pull her around. And yet, that is not what was happening. Rasha was trying attentively to understand what Deanna wanted and to do it. But there was the risk: that Deanna would be hurt.
The white of the Toyota caught my eye as Leilani drove a little quicker than I would like around the dirt track. She slowed down as she came around the curve to drive back toward me. It dawned on me that I may be taking a risk in allowing her to drive. Although, she really couldn’t hurt anything even if she did run into the hay bales, she was still just a little girl and the car was a big piece of machinery.
Needless to say, I was a little bit stressed: keeping an eye on Deanna, who had been working with Rasha alone for the last 3 months, and keeping an eye on Leilani as she drove around. I comforted myself with the fact that in order to have the courage to deal with things larger than themselves, they had to have practice – even if they might get hurt. They needed opportunities to trust God with the unknowns. Someday it was not going to be just a horse and a car. Someday it was going to be a marriage or a job or a child. If they had the courage and confidence with the horse and the car, then when the time came for the other challenges, they would be able to face them without fear knowing that God would be there. But it didn’t take all of my stress away.
I remember something my mother told me when my kids were toddlers. We were at the park one day and I was running around managing several little 2, 3 and 4 year olds with my mother’s help. Deanna was only about 15 months at the time, but she was walking and running around the playground determined to keep up with her brothers and playmates. As she watched her brother slide down the big slide, she decided that she could do it, too. My first instinct was to go and stop her from climbing up, but my mother touched my arm and said, “Be there, but let her try if she thinks she can do it. She knows what her body can do.” So, I spotted her as she climbed and then ran to the bottom of the slide to catch her when she came down. Whoosh! Suddenly, I had a very giggly little girl in my arms saying, “Again! Again!”
Now, she was conquering horse training with the same determination and fearlessness. With confidence, she was commanding the attention of a being larger than herself and learning the way to communicate patiently. Her trust in God seemed instinctive as the “spirit of power and a sound mind” showed up in her tone of voice and easy stance.
Leilani had parked the car and Deanna was now eliciting her help with Rasha. Leilani was given the lead and the “handy stick” and shown what to do. Deanna was now going to ride Rasha for the first time. She coached Leilani through the commands and allowed her to do it by herself a few times.
“Ok,” she called to Leilani. “Let me get up in the saddle. You hold the lead.” And up she went. Rasha was a little nervous, but obediently attended to Leilani’s commands as her ears swiveled between the girl in front and the voice behind. But, because of Deanna’s patience, Rasha was ready to have a rider and did very well. Meanwhile, I gripped the rail so tight my knuckles turned white and I think I bit my lip. But I was determined to model the trusting God part.
That evening I told Papa all about the adventures of the day. He was amazed and proud of his daughters and told them so. When we prayed, we thanked God for being there for them…and for me. May the Lord give me courage for the next adventure, conquering the “bigger things” along with my children.
For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.
2Ti 1:7
Some trust in chariots, and some in horses: but we will remember the name of the LORD our God. Psa 20:7
Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass. Psa 37:5
Showing posts with label daughters. Show all posts
Showing posts with label daughters. Show all posts
Monday, August 15, 2011
Sunday, May 1, 2011
Pretty Women
The most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched, they must be felt with the heart.
Helen Keller
We took over the dressing room at Marshalls. The three girls, their three friends and I were each trying on several dresses for Easter. I went first, since I dress the fastest and had the fewest to try on. As I came out of my little temporary cubby (why do the mirrors in those things seem to accuse rather than flatter?), I was greeted with “O, mom, you look great!” “You’re so pretty!” “Mom, I love that dress!” Gratified, in spite of my thickening waist and sagging muscles, I put my own clothes back on and settled in the midst of them to “thumbs up” or “thumbs down” their choices.
They each put on a dress and came out for my inspection. If they didn’t really like it at all, they didn’t even bother showing me. But if they thought it was cute, they were out modeling it for me in the bigger mirror. One by one, the dresses either brought out their beauty or squelched it. Elizabeth looked wonderful in the cream sun dress which accented her red hair. Anneliese looked beautiful in the silk brown and green print…although we needed to find a jacket or something for her bare shoulders; but not in the little black number that clung to every curve. Leilani looked wonderful in the soft browns of her sundress which accented her eyes and hair; but not in short purple number with spaghetti straps. A couple of times, one of them would come out wearing something “hoochie mama!” and we’d all give it a thumbs down. The dress might be pretty, but it accented the wrong kind of beauty.
Deanna found a beautiful green print that made her look taller and slenderer with extra blue eyes. Mikayla found several that would have been pretty, but didn’t do her justice and so she ended up without a dress rather than wear something that cheapened her beauty or made it seem base.
After leaving the store, we visited friends, looked in on my son, Adrian, and went to the movies. Our group of pretty girls made quite a sight going in and out of the mall. I observed, even if the girls didn’t, that heads turned and eyes flashed in our direction as we passed. It made me puff out my chest and lead boldly – proud of my beautiful entourage.
But what made these young ladies so pretty? It wasn’t the jeans and the tennis shoes. It wasn’t the make-up, because they were wearing little to none. When I got to thinking about it, it was the way they walked confidently, smiled and joked with each other, spoke politely to the sales clerks, talked amongst themselves about what they saw in the shop windows and the way that they were totally unaware of the beauty that seemed to envelop them like a cloud.
In so many ways, beauty is intangible. Sometimes the most beautiful of women can shatter that outward mask with a cynical word or sly look. If we think of beauty as something only visible with the human eye, then the adage “beauty is only skin deep” is true. However, if we realize that true beauty is not so much what is visible to the eye, but what is sensed in the soul, we then realize that what is on the outside is only a fraction of the story.
The next day, Deanna was up with me early in the morning giving me her schedule for the day. “After I go feed the horses for Bob, I’m going to go help Irene (the elderly lady next door) with her house work. I don’t want to get a job until I know how much longer she will need me.” Irene had come to me a couple of weeks ago and asked if Deanna would be willing to help her until she moved in with her sister. Deanna had been glad to go over several days a week to clean, help her walk, and exercise some after a back injury. It seems that Deanna is frequently in demand to help someone move, do yard work, dog sit, etc.
Later that day, one of my clients was telling me about Mikayla, who had recently been hired at one of the local restaurants. “She is so cute. She leaves us little notes everywhere,” she told me. “Notes?” I asked. “Yes. She leaves us notes saying ‘thank you’ or ‘I love working with you’ and stuff like that,” she replied. Mikayla is a natural encourager, but I didn’t realize that she would do something so sweet for her co-workers. That night, Mik told me a little about how her work was going and asked me to pray for some of her friends.
My mother used to tell me, ‘Beauty is as beauty does’. I think my daughters are beautiful because of what they do – help others, encourage their friends, pray for one another – even if it takes work or doesn’t yield immediate results. No one is perfect and my daughters aren’t always doing ‘beautiful’ things; but, overall, who they are inside is beautiful. Just as my mother encouraged me, I’m going to encourage my girls to focus on their true beauty and continue being pretty women.
1Pe 3:3 - 4 Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden being of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a humble and peaceable spirit, which is in the sight of God of great value.
Helen Keller
We took over the dressing room at Marshalls. The three girls, their three friends and I were each trying on several dresses for Easter. I went first, since I dress the fastest and had the fewest to try on. As I came out of my little temporary cubby (why do the mirrors in those things seem to accuse rather than flatter?), I was greeted with “O, mom, you look great!” “You’re so pretty!” “Mom, I love that dress!” Gratified, in spite of my thickening waist and sagging muscles, I put my own clothes back on and settled in the midst of them to “thumbs up” or “thumbs down” their choices.
They each put on a dress and came out for my inspection. If they didn’t really like it at all, they didn’t even bother showing me. But if they thought it was cute, they were out modeling it for me in the bigger mirror. One by one, the dresses either brought out their beauty or squelched it. Elizabeth looked wonderful in the cream sun dress which accented her red hair. Anneliese looked beautiful in the silk brown and green print…although we needed to find a jacket or something for her bare shoulders; but not in the little black number that clung to every curve. Leilani looked wonderful in the soft browns of her sundress which accented her eyes and hair; but not in short purple number with spaghetti straps. A couple of times, one of them would come out wearing something “hoochie mama!” and we’d all give it a thumbs down. The dress might be pretty, but it accented the wrong kind of beauty.
Deanna found a beautiful green print that made her look taller and slenderer with extra blue eyes. Mikayla found several that would have been pretty, but didn’t do her justice and so she ended up without a dress rather than wear something that cheapened her beauty or made it seem base.
After leaving the store, we visited friends, looked in on my son, Adrian, and went to the movies. Our group of pretty girls made quite a sight going in and out of the mall. I observed, even if the girls didn’t, that heads turned and eyes flashed in our direction as we passed. It made me puff out my chest and lead boldly – proud of my beautiful entourage.
But what made these young ladies so pretty? It wasn’t the jeans and the tennis shoes. It wasn’t the make-up, because they were wearing little to none. When I got to thinking about it, it was the way they walked confidently, smiled and joked with each other, spoke politely to the sales clerks, talked amongst themselves about what they saw in the shop windows and the way that they were totally unaware of the beauty that seemed to envelop them like a cloud.
In so many ways, beauty is intangible. Sometimes the most beautiful of women can shatter that outward mask with a cynical word or sly look. If we think of beauty as something only visible with the human eye, then the adage “beauty is only skin deep” is true. However, if we realize that true beauty is not so much what is visible to the eye, but what is sensed in the soul, we then realize that what is on the outside is only a fraction of the story.
The next day, Deanna was up with me early in the morning giving me her schedule for the day. “After I go feed the horses for Bob, I’m going to go help Irene (the elderly lady next door) with her house work. I don’t want to get a job until I know how much longer she will need me.” Irene had come to me a couple of weeks ago and asked if Deanna would be willing to help her until she moved in with her sister. Deanna had been glad to go over several days a week to clean, help her walk, and exercise some after a back injury. It seems that Deanna is frequently in demand to help someone move, do yard work, dog sit, etc.
Later that day, one of my clients was telling me about Mikayla, who had recently been hired at one of the local restaurants. “She is so cute. She leaves us little notes everywhere,” she told me. “Notes?” I asked. “Yes. She leaves us notes saying ‘thank you’ or ‘I love working with you’ and stuff like that,” she replied. Mikayla is a natural encourager, but I didn’t realize that she would do something so sweet for her co-workers. That night, Mik told me a little about how her work was going and asked me to pray for some of her friends.
My mother used to tell me, ‘Beauty is as beauty does’. I think my daughters are beautiful because of what they do – help others, encourage their friends, pray for one another – even if it takes work or doesn’t yield immediate results. No one is perfect and my daughters aren’t always doing ‘beautiful’ things; but, overall, who they are inside is beautiful. Just as my mother encouraged me, I’m going to encourage my girls to focus on their true beauty and continue being pretty women.
1Pe 3:3 - 4 Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden being of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a humble and peaceable spirit, which is in the sight of God of great value.
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